Apart from pristine white people like Satyawadi Harishchandra who actually offered himself up for sale for the sake of truth and a few elevated souls, it is difficult to come across anyone who has never lied. I am not talking about blatant lies which are there for the world to see. There are many levels to lies or telling an untruth. The interesting part is that some lies have positive results as well.
On the cognitive level, just to get our work done, we often tweak the truth and don’t think about doing so twice. Before we know it, small untruths add up to a large but unnoticeable pile. Our ignorance makes us a little complacent about the ethics of it all. Yes, the belief is that if a little lies does no harm to anyone, and is the way forward for the person speaking it, it is valid. Well! This is personal ethics and depends on the sensitivity to truth for each individual. The quest for truth becomes valuable to the state of mind only when we actually attempt to get into that space.
When my children were growing up, I always told them that if they were doing something that they needed to hide from their parents, it was probably not worth doing at all. But, as adults, we have only ourselves to finally give that certificate to ourselves. We can hide from everyone except ourselves. Personal ethics and code of conduct, therefore, dictates our well being and keeps us away from stress- related feelings such as guilt and anxiety.
We grew up with the principle of “honesty is the best policy”, termed today by many, as utopia and completely un- doable! If we analyze the cynical reaction to this principle, it stems from the opposite belief system that “honesty gets you nowhere.” Preceding this belief system is the gradual lack of transparency and the resulting lack of trust in individuals which has contributed to opacity within families and societies. The concept of sharing has been replaced by “I want more” by a majority. This attitude inevitably leads to gaining through devious methods. In cases where we lose our individual sense of equanimity and justice to accommodate our extra and often unreasonable needs, truth seldom prevails.
Coming back to speaking a lie, we need to understand its other and positive aspect. If telling a lie saves an innocent life, it is justified. If telling a lie achieves the larger good, it is valid. So, it is the intention behind the need to lie that is at the very core of that lie. Unfortunately, we don’t actually have a way of recording the result of each lie within our minds except through a lot of introspection. I believe we have all the answers within us. We just don’t listen to our inner voices because it goes against what we “want” and we are insatiable in our wants. Truth also becomes a casualty due to this.
Today, we need to look at the option of going back to the values and attitudes which can create a peaceful, harmonious and prosperous society and country. While cynics might think this is too naive a view point, I trust the process of change. I see a transparent society based on trust and ethics as a very viable and workable plan of action for future growth.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari
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