Human nature

It is human nature to dwell on hurt more than happiness. Both words start with "H" but they are poles apart in their emotional content and precisely because we can't find enough energy to feel complete. "They" can only affect you if YOU let them, because YOU don't understand that YOU give them power over you.

We find it very difficult to say "no" in general. We compromise, get dragged and pulled and pushed on account of playing different roles and for the sake of other people. This inevitably goes against our grain and gradually, to resentment and a kind of anger which snowballs into inadequacy and complexes. And the next thing you know is, you start letting others upset you because are upset already. You start attracting people who upset you and comments that throw you over the edge.

But for how long and more important and at what cost? You can learn to say NO to hurt, to being hurt. For some, baiting is a game they play to feel superior by getting that extra power from those who are vulnerable. And the vulnerable get hurt instead of smiling it away, as simple as that.

Say NO to hurt and people will not affect you anymore.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Quote of the day

Quote of the day

The Art of Living

The focal point of our life is the heart. Cleansing the blood and sending it to all the body parts. The seat of love, compassion, empathy, kindness and the seat of emotion, the bridge between our existence on earth and the anchor to the Divine.

To keep the heart light, protected and safe is the (he) Art of living.

As we take the gifts of kindness and love and need to reciprocate, so do we have to return back to the people their gifts of negativity that they give us. But we don't do that. We accept them and the heart becomes hurt.

It is so simple that the choice of what to ACCEPT is ours. If we don't accept the gifts of anger, hatred, resentment, rudeness etc, where do they go ? Obvious, they will stay with the same person. Well, please give it back. Your heart is not worth hurting for anything in the world. Is it? Do we deliberately let a bee sting us? But we do let people sting us where it hurts any reason to allow this?

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Visionaries

Visionaries are the luminaries in this world. They think big. They think vast. Their imagination touches the sky. They are expanding their horizons each minute and have little time for constricted and narrow thought processes.

Unfortunately, the fourth dimension eludes us. And in this three dimensional world, we tend to get more focused on the petty thinking patterns because we live a life of low vibration and low intelligence. And so, we tend to focus on the external world and on comparisons with other humans, and this takes away our ability for a larger vision.

It is like the frog thinking that it is the king of the well and there is nothing beyond the well.

I do hope some positive transitions will bring in positive trends and we will also start to become more expansive than restrictive, in thinking, imagining and manifesting.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Quote of the day

Quote of the day

Philosophies of life

Isn't it amazing, this zest for life and will to live? Despite lives ending around us and all kinds of ailments plaguing humanity, we still carry on. Philosophies of life emerge every day. Some listen. Some listen and practice. Some don't listen. Some don't want to know and are happy in their world. Seasons come and go. Wrinkles start to show, last on the face and limbs. Those on the mind are older but when they manifest outwardly, we begin to take notice.

We are humans. We will regress some, progress some, cry some, laugh some, and carry on living life with all that we have, good, bad and indifferent. Who is anyone to say what these mean anyway? Because they mean so many different things to so many different people that you get exhausted from trying to fathom and analyze. It's like you roam all over the world and then finally, come back and rest only in your home.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Loyalty

The whole world with a few exceptions is involved in a race for money, name and fame. And yet, ask them if they are happy. You can show off your opulence, your power to the world AND have many people in awe of you, even eager to befriend you. But you know they are not the right ones. In fact, it is really lonely at the top. You get insecure, don't know who to trust, start using people to multiply your money and power and needless to say, people won't do it for the love of you. And you can't buy love or respect. You lose sleep trying just to sustain your room at the top.

I am sure people feel good when they are chased and admired and clamor for one photograph with them. The feeling however, is hollow. There are empty places within where you will never allow people. At best, loyalty from them may be bought by you and again lasts only till you keep filled on the pockets. Despite possessing much, you know you are not wanted for yourself but for your worldly possessions.

People who run after you for what you have will run away from you the day you don't have it. What remains intact and fills up the void and makes you really rich are love of family, goodness and charitable attitude towards each other, mutual respect.

Attitude of gratitude, forgiving and forgetting, kindness, and empathy in fact, humanity, humaneness which is the only religion that will work and these are not buyable.

The rich are those who are gifted with THESE qualities. And certainly, these cannot be bought. Either you have them or you don't. And if you want them, you can’t buy them. So, here we are....

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Quote of the day

Humility

The more successful and sought after you become, the more humble you must be. This is called "digesting" your success. With this comes congeniality and genuine praise from people.

It's like a beautiful person who is completely unaware of her beauty. She is loved for being just herself. When arrogance sets in, even a beautiful or successful person begins to seem unattractive and often, starts to lose friendships both inside and outside the family. Losing sight of the niceness of those around you and whatever they have sacrificed or done for you is a trait that comes in with the ego that develops with success. Do not succumb because soon, even your success will begin to feel a little hollow.

This is the mantra for living. Be humble, because anything can be taken away: success, beauty, anything. What remains with you is you humility, genuineness and consideration for others. It is not everyone that can remain with feet on the ground whatever status they acquire. Absolutely essential to introspect and mend your ways, as you leave others to mend theirs.

A tree laden with fruits bends its branches more than one that does not bear fruit. So, with success should come the humility.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Quote of the day

Quote of the day

Commitment

There was a time when women wielded power at home through controlling their husbands and sons. That is where the source of finance was, too. How different is the world of a woman today. She has begun to come into her own and is getting her own sense of personal well being through education, work and financial Independence.

There has always been a debate as to whether there could be marital discord or a lack of tolerance and commitment between couples due to this evolution of the woman. But is that really the only reason? Does commitment to a spouse get diluted with the woman having her own financial security? If so, then what are we implying? That if she did not have access to finance, she would have had no recourse but to tolerate her situation for life?

Especially in case of a difficult marriage only because she would have nowhere to go. That is the reality of many women even today but this is changing.

Commitment between two people really depends on their love and respect for each other. The friendship they share. How much they value and cherish each other. Money comes in between only when there is space for it to become an issue. And when ego raises its head, protecting the traditional role of men as bread winners, from where came their superiority in a manner of speaking.

Today, education and a knowledge based economy has leveled out ( up to a point ) the chasm between genders and hopefully, men will realize the importance of finding an equal status with women a matter of pride rather than competition, plus the fact that each one becomes a productive citizen of the society.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Path of evolution

I really want to say a few words about our allegiance to a particular religion. Needless to say, all religions are beautiful. And I can totally accept that individuals resonate with different religions based even on past lives.

For example, if I have led a Buddhist monks life in an earlier life, there will be episodes in my life when the Buddhist chanting will come to me. This has actually happened to me. And believe me, this has happened to many of us but we have not linked the dots and have missed the experience in our state of unawareness.

So, since we have a little bit of so many lifetimes within us, how can we afford to be intolerant at all? If I remembered all my lives, I could have had many religions, right? It is a possibility. And if I hate a religion, there has to be a resonance there as well. Surely, my experience in another life has led me to be that way. I need to heal this with the knowledge that I did not know better then. I know now. And so, I don't hate anymore.

This has to be the path of evolution we walk on in everything. What else is the purpose of our life?

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Observe

To have an opinion means you are a thinking person. To be rigid about your opinion shows that you have not churned your opinion with that of others and then found yours to be the final and convincing one. To keep changing your opinion means you are unsure of yourself. To shy away from voicing your opinion means that you might be intimidated by others who express freely. And to keep voicing your opinion at every step shows an ego which is not really inspired by knowledge.

And this is just my opinion based on observations and waiting to be churned with those of others on their observations.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Quote of the day

Quote of the day

Exaggerated politeness

You must have come across people who never look straight into your eyes and talk or, will talk with an exaggerated politeness, especially in public. They probably have some need to be connected with you but don't necessarily like you too much. Each time you look at them, they will be looking at you with an undefined expression from the corner of their eyes and will quickly turn away when you actually catch them looking at you.

As we grow older, I guess we start observing more. As they say, who knows what feelings people are hiding under that obscure, even blank look!! We succeed in reading such aspects of people with growing awareness.

The biggest challenge is to understand where people are coming from and then getting immune to their machinations. You know what is going on behind the scenes. You are able to see it clearly but you are not going to let it affect you. Once you know and there are no obscurities that are your power and your strength to work with.

Here, too, you need courage to endorse your own path. And stay with it. "Men may come and men may go but I go on forever" kind of doggedness. Energize! Constantly energize! And immunize!

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Everything & Nothing

No matter who you are, how experienced you are, and how knowledgeable you think you are, always delay judgment.

Give others the privilege to explain themselves.

What you see may not be the reality. Never conclude for others.

Which is why we should never only focus on the surface and judge others without understanding them first?

Those who like to pay the bill, do so not because they are loaded but because they value friendship above money.

Those who take the initiative at work, do so not because they are stupid but because they understand the concept of responsibility.

Those who apologize first after a fight, do so not because they are wrong but because they value the people around them.

Those who are willing to help you, do so not because they owe you any thing but because they see you as a true friend.

Those who often text you, do so not because they have nothing better to do but because you are in their heart.

Those who take out time to chat with you, does not mean they are jobless or less busy, but they know the importance of keeping in touch.

One day, all of us will get separated from each other; we will miss our conversations of everything & nothing; the dreams that we had.

Days will pass by, months, years, until this contact becomes rare... One day our children will see our pictures and ask 'Who are these people?' And we will smile; the heart is touched by strong words and you will say: 'IT WAS WITH THEM, THAT I HAD SOME OF THE BEST DAYS OF MY LIFE'.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Quote of the day

Quote of the day

Actions can make a difference

We bring change through example, not words. Sooner or later, words fade into significance and people start scrutinizing the person behind the words. Heard of the saying," pot calling the kettle black?" Only actions can make a difference.

When I was travelling back to Chennai from Mumbai, I saw a family of parents and 3 to 4 children who were making a real racket and drawing the frowning attention of the passengers around them. The parents were laughing and talking really loudly and so were the kids being unruly and loud. You could see that the attitude of self absorption did not remotely register in their minds and behavior in public places was not a subject of study.

BE the person you want the other to be. Many parents cease to have influence on their kids until they understand that children learn what they demonstrate, likewise in any situation in life; at home in society or workplace.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Quote of the day

Quote of the day

Laughter clubs

We often forget what it is like to laugh whole heartedly. More often than not, we smile politely. Laugh because it should be done at a joke so that the teller may not feel bad. This has not much salutary effect.

Even as a child, I had the reputation of being a little crazy. I would laugh at small things and often, become hysterical and laugh till tears came out of my eyes. My siblings would roll their eyes and say, "there she goes again". But I had so much fun! 

They say, God lives within this kind of laughter. Just a way of saying that a no hold barred laugh can change the composition of your body and charge it with so much positive energy that you feel blissful all day. Like, God is with you.

Laughter clubs started for this reason. Stress is relieved almost immediately if you can laugh out aloud. Laughter is very contagious. You will notice that you cannot remain immune for too long and will be triggered by people laughing continuously around you, so wishing you hours, days and weeks of happy laughter. Stay blessed and joyful. You don't need stress as your companion for sure.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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