Wednesday 29 April 2020
Tuesday 28 April 2020
Communication
It is important to know when to communicate
but more important to know when not to communicate. We all go through phases
when we do things out of good intentions but offend some sensibilities. Fair
enough. This happens sometimes to us also and then we are left to deal with our
feelings like others deal with theirs.
But in all of this, when one tries to
smoothen the ruffled feathers, not once but many times and there is no
response, it is time to withdraw communication.
Holding on is not healthy but some people
can’t let go easily. They have to work out their feelings and their
relationship on their own. More so, the intentions of others may take time. It
is all a part of the drama. But important to understand that this is not about
us or who we are.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Monday 27 April 2020
Sunday 26 April 2020
Judgment
What is fair? What is just? And what is truth?
Actually, there isn’t any simple answer. Because we are constantly exposed to
so many angles of the same story, so many different perspectives, that we
arrive at our personal perspective and understanding of the truth and take that
as gospel truth. Our convictions are also based on several viewpoints which
culminate into one so called “truth. And we hold onto it at the cost of
conflict with another person’s views.
But truth lies somewhere between all these
perspectives and our understanding may not be quite there. That is why it is
not wise to judge. You really don’t know. What you think you know may not be
anywhere close to the truth. And therefore, it is not really wise to get into
discussions of this nature.
So, better not to claim to know and hence,
avoid judgments.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari
Thursday 23 April 2020
Spiritual Health
It is important to train yourself to
understand that YOUR life and your spiritual health is THE single most
important thing or at least, should be, for you. You have to and must keep your
focus on your well being and this should certainly not depend on someone else whoever
it may be.
If you notice, the moment you stop taking
the words or actions of others seriously and stop applying them to yourself,
you begin to feel your energies lightening. Many must have experienced this.
The heaviness leaves you. You can think more clearly and resume your own
activities with a new vigor.
There is much to be said about taking
things with a big pinch of salt.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Wednesday 22 April 2020
Tuesday 21 April 2020
Arrogance
Learning is directly proportional to your
awareness that you NEED to learn to develop other parts of your personality.
This awareness makes you come under the “smart” category. You can learn from
anyone and anything if you want to. Yes, some of us like to make our own
mistakes and learn and don’t want to be advised. But the last categories are
the ones who come into the category of the ignorant. Once you feel you have all
the answers, there is no learning or growth thereafter.
Who has all the answers? What it is, is an
attitude of defiance, an element of ego that refuses to stand corrected an
arrogance which stunts any possibility of illumination.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Monday 20 April 2020
Sunday 19 April 2020
Anger
Anger has strange reactions. But if truth
be told, if you hit your fist against a wall angrily, who will get hurt? Anger
will make you inflict hurt on yourself all the time because it is self
directed. At the choices you make, the mistakes you make, the people you choose
to be around and get betrayed by ... etc. it is always you, you and you.
Juxtaposing this on a family situation, if
you choose to cause dissensions within your family for your own sins so to
speak, you are taking away your own support system and weakening your own spine
, that is, your family.
In a nutshell, anger is nothing if not self
destructive. And adopting corrective measures is better than ruining a solid
edifice of pillars that supports you.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Wednesday 15 April 2020
Endorsement
No one knows you as much as you know
yourself. Do you accept that ? Or don’t you believe that? When people profess
to know you better than you know yourself, you get into a conflict between yourself
image and other image if you are not sure about yourself.
The main issue is that we don’t listen to
ourselves and keep working against our instincts. Compromising at every step more
conflict arises in such cases; Out of some fear, some insecurities concerning
the external world, of belonging and acceptance. If you are well adjusted to
your inner world, you don’t need any external endorsements.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Thursday 9 April 2020
Wednesday 8 April 2020
Tuesday 7 April 2020
Meditation
Watch your breath ! It takes some training
but if you watch your breath or keep your breath within your awareness ,
whatever else you are doing at that moment, something miraculous happens.
You just never let go of your control . The
breath regulates your thoughts, your reactions and your emotions.
If you notice, the pattern of your breath
changes with the quality of your emotions. When you are angry, your breath is
shallow and fast. In meditation, your breath slows down .
People get confused about what exactly
meditation is. Constant breath awareness is nothing short of meditation. There
is no need to sit down specially, and close your eyes and try to remove your
thoughts. Many people find this frustrating and they drop meditation
completely. For these people, I would really recommend watching your breath and
experiencing beautiful changes.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Monday 6 April 2020
Sunday 5 April 2020
The Freedom Movement
Our generation, which was born around the
freedom movement, much idealism , patriotism, the spirit of sacrifice, of
honour and integrity, has more than its share of emotions. Emotions were our
ammunition to deal with injustice and for a strike for independence from
colonialism.
We were also taught to give more than take.
We respected morality, ethics and principles. We were loyal to family, to
social ethics, to senior citizens and prided ourselves in being the way we
were.
Today, we are gradually beginning to
realise that these are the values to imbibe. Standing tall is in fashion,
thanks to our PM, who is as humane as he is a no nonsense Indian, proud and
self respecting not only on his behalf but on behalf of the nation. He exudes
an exemplary and inspiring persona. You want to emulate him.
It strikes a chord within my generation and
sparks a hope that we can salvage the traditional and cultural heritage that
keep our heads held high. Proud to be an Indian , especially from the earlier
generation.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari
Thursday 2 April 2020
Aware of the patterns
It takes a while for people to believe that
we can heal ourselves in many ways. Because we are responsible for making
ourselves ill in the first place, we have also been endowed with self healing
powers. Some terminal cases have been healed , too. Two cases that I know of
with terminal illnesses cured themselves just through a few hours of pranayama
per day.
The fact of the matter is , our thoughts
and emotions when starting to deeply embed within ourselves are what manifest
later. Negative emotions arising out of negative thoughts are the core reason
for a gradual
Deterioration in health.
People ask me how any “ normal” person can
stop feeling hurt or sad or depressed or angry at some time and in some
situations. Sure ! True. But it is one thing to feel it momentarily and another
to let it fester. Instead, it is healthier to let it go. Any emotion that is doing
harm instead of good cannot be acceptable.
If relationships you have valued get
affected, if restlessness and guilt sets in, if peace eludes you and thoughts
crowd you each second, you haven’t started walking towards the path of light.
Become aware of the patterns and
stereotypes you live with and don’t hesitate in asking for forgiveness,
forgiving yourself and erase any memories that are painful, knowing they are
just your perceptions. Give the benefit of doubt . And let go , let go. How
many times ? Well, all the time. Holding on will harm you. It will bring
illnesses you don’t need anytime soon , in fact, not at all.
So, relax. Have a “char minar,” as the
saying goes.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
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