Wednesday 31 January 2018
Tuesday 30 January 2018
Unconditional love
Just because the clouds hide the sun
doesn't negate its existence. And just because the loved ones pass from this
world doesn't mean they are not connected with us. I do believe they watch over
us. And I do believe we carry their energy within us, within our memory bank.
It would be nice to acknowledge them and
all the elevated souls who are within reach should we ever want to reach out
for help. And even if we don't, they are the epitome of unconditional love.
This also shows the importance of the
family tree, each member closely connected in group karma and therefore, very
important in our evolution.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Monday 29 January 2018
Sunday 28 January 2018
Caring
A little enquiry at the right time goes a
long way. Whether family, friends or good acquaintances, which little bit of
concern in adverse times goes a long way in spreading warmth. I don't think it
is imperative to come forward only in a crisis. Of course, that is a must. But
what people really want is a small doze of constant warmth and caring.
The issues get more aggravated than
necessary very often because there are flimsy grounds for getting hurt today.
Anything small can become a big and even lifelong issue unless two people want
to sort things out. Principles and commitment being things of the past, we can
seek a good time anywhere and everywhere. Under these conditions, the warmth
may also be meted out to the people you need in your life. And sadly, they need
not be the people you have grown up with or spent time with.
Such is life and we still need
to find our own peace amidst the chaos and disturbances in life.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Wednesday 24 January 2018
Tuesday 23 January 2018
Consequence
I read somewhere that grief is
unproductive. And frankly, I have to agree at some level. Though grief is the
most intense form of loss, it can also be felt for lesser types of loss in the
larger context. For example, loss of Jewelry would be a lesser loss than the
loss of a loved one. However, it is often very difficult to qualify grief
because it is directly proportionate to the attachment levels. It can be an
extreme form of a deep wound or hurt. A deep disillusionment about a loved
person can result in grief.
What is really the dangerous consequence is
the depression, the loss of hope that could set in. It can lead to mental
disorders of a serious nature. At such times, a strong faith is the only guide
that keeps you going. And the fact that even if there are underlying threads of
grief which are permanent, there can be a recourse to other things which can
engage the mind to disconnect with the grief if we can attempt this.
I try to give myself the advice I give to
clients and that is challenging. It is so easy to guide others but when it
comes to ourselves, don't we often fail to take our own advice?
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Monday 22 January 2018
Sunday 21 January 2018
Common sense
"Common
sense is uncommon" is a popular saying. I think good sense is equally
uncommon. I mean, just look at us! We search for love but want it on our terms.
When we have an issue with someone, we want the other person to come forward in
reconciliation. We can prolong a simple misunderstanding indefinitely, being
miserable and making another person equally miserable. But each one would
rather convert themselves into a bunch of knots rather than forgive, forget and
give a loving hug to each other. We are so funny that we will seethe in anger
for years on a small issue ( of course, we amplify it to look humongous) but
will not call it quits and move on.
Family
feuds, sibling rivalry, petty comparisons... you name it and they are rampant
and ultimately to what end? To lose valuable relationships and turn away from
your own near and dear ones? To refuse to communicate to iron out hurts and misunderstandings?
Only human beings can live with so much self promoted negativity, forgetting
all the good times shared, the loving moments shared. More often than not, everything
boils down to the "I am the one who is right" syndrome.
So,
tell me. Isn't good sense uncommon?
I remember the story of the man who sat on
the branch of a tree to cut some wood for fire and was cutting the very branch
he was sitting on without the good sense that he would fall and break a few
bones. If we look within us, we can see many such broken bones but would we
admit that? NO, sure...we still boast of having good sense, you see!
Surekha
Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Thursday 18 January 2018
Aspects of life
You know, there is a need for each one of
us to seek as much exposure to the various aspects of life as possible because
only by observing the lives of others, different situations arising out of who
you are and how much you earn and how honed a personality you have ended up
becoming....
There are people who live in their own
little world who just don't develop themselves because they are just too myopic
or fearful.
You can easily educate yourself on your
own. Provided you want to. You just need interest, attitude and time, apart
from being like a sponge and imbibing and imbibing more and more, internalizing
the information and then making the necessary changes to your thinking and
emotions.
We tend to look at people very
superficially and tend to shun people who we don't understand instead of trying
to understand them and learning something we don't know.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Wednesday 17 January 2018
Tuesday 16 January 2018
Personality
I want to talk about real people today,
people who laugh and cry, love and lie, are honest sometimes and manipulative
at other times. People who hurt and who forgive. Ordinary people who can be
extraordinary. Intelligent ones who can goof up every now and then, people who
can make a mistake and laugh at themselves. People who can bear a lifelong
grudge and let go also.
How does one live in a synthetic world of
" best behavior 24•7 " it would be an exhausting exercise. Smile
politely. Talk politely. Keep your voice down just enough. Never say a
contradictory word. Always agree to the opinion of others. Just listen ... and
all will be well apart from the fact that you would in this case, be one of the
most boring people one had the "fortune" of knowing.
Give me real people any day.
The "dhishoom dhishoom” types. They have an interesting personality at
least.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Monday 15 January 2018
Thursday 11 January 2018
Talent and confidence
Talent and confidence! It is a two in one
package and no two ways about it. Right from the time that parents either
encourage and appreciate or the reverse, a person becomes either confident or
diffident. When opportunities are denied growing up, talent languishes because
of a lack of self belief. "I can do it" and "I am good
enough", the two most an important conviction without which whatever is
learnt stays unexposed and in utilized. Many, many instances can I quote, of
such cases where the talented little child becomes an adult but has not learned
to breathe independently, to showcase the uniqueness with aplomb.....
Someone, somewhere did not notice,
appreciate or nurture that uniqueness, that talent which lay sacrificed at the altar
of hesitation and maybe, timidity also. Or maybe an implicit and innocent faith
in the capacity of the discernment of elders which was a faith gone wrong.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Wednesday 10 January 2018
Tuesday 9 January 2018
Celebrate life
Ironing out the creases of life is a life
well spent Or else to truly forget and make merry. Celebrate life every day.
Some of us who were brought up to admonish our own shadow for losing our
seriousness value the light moments of our lives more than others would
understand.
To shut out anything heavy consciously is
no mean task. The lightness of being happens as we drop the burdens we carry.
Ironically and contrary to everything else, this process is not time bound or
tabulated. One spark of realization about the futility of carrying your load
and it can be like instant coffee. Instant Nirvana! Or then, there is always
the possibility of the one step forward and two backwards theories.
So much unlearning and
unwinding precedes becoming light for many of us who have wound ourselves
tightly and created several knots. Generally takes a lot of time to loosen and
let go. So, there is no better time than NOW to start, Better late than
"The late".
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Monday 8 January 2018
Sunday 7 January 2018
Knowledge is power
That knowledge is power is a well known
truth. But truth also has two sides. And so, the power of knowledge can have
undesirable traits piling up, too. When knowledge is combined with power of the
wrong kind, it can cause endless agony and destruction.
As Lord Acton said, "Power corrupts
and absolute power corrupts absolutely". I know it is ironic and a paradox
that both words can be incompatible. But the beauty of humans is that their
minds find it easier to get twisted in the negative direction rather than
towards straight thinking, simple thinking and positive thinking.
You can be in any profession, have any
vocation but there is always a danger of developing arrogance, an illusion of
superiority and ego on the path of knowledge, evidently in comparison with the
less knowledgeable. There are two ways of handling knowledge. One, by wanting a
monopoly over it and two, by spreading it. The tendency for a monopoly goes
hand in hand with controlling the environment and its people whereas spreading
knowledge opens the heart and enables a person to become like a tree which
grows tall and gives shade unconditionally.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari
Thursday 4 January 2018
Goals
Everyone has or should have a focus in
life. Drifting is not the best of things to do. Life moves pretty quickly if
actions are focused. And are goal determined, because we are working towards
something with creativity. Most satisfying, even if the goal is not an enormous
one.
I am amazed at this experience of being a
universe within a universe. Each one of us is. Suddenly, you feel free from
crutches... and you begin to see people as they are and not the way you want
them to be. You begin to see actions without judging. You understand who and
what is a part of your personal universe and who is not. Quite amazing!
When you begin to watch yourself, you begin
to notice that there is someone else within you who is watching and there is no
need to feel alienated with oneself. That everything is a part and parcel of
us.
As if from far away, I watch the world go
by and I am able to converse with that other part of me which watches and then
discusses with me. You know, there is absolutely no use of agitation at
anything. What will be will be? And we proceed in our journey on the river of
life, smiling at the ripples as well as the obstacles because we know it is not
the real "me" but someone else who is experiencing life and I am but
a shadow. The day I breathe my last, my shadow will disappear into the universe
to create a new "me" once again.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Tuesday 2 January 2018
Happiness
The purest of emotions in the world today
is good will. Where people live more within their dark side, to have good will
and be happy for someone else is amazing. When you hear people in conversation,
the most common topic is about people running down people and hating the
success of others. Why?
A lack of contentment mostly, with one's
own lot. An inability to run through the chapters of the book of life of others,
failing to remember their dark days and envying their bright spots. Very sad! And
that's probably why it is so refreshing to find those odd ones who really prop
you up and don't grudge you a little happiness. In fact, they share it.
May the tribe of such people increase!
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Monday 1 January 2018
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