Relationships

There are always those who understand and those who misunderstand. Sometimes, you lose relationships because you DON’T understand.

You are in danger of losing those who are closest to you because emotions run high. AND a small episode can trigger massive hurt. 

It is really time to understand that there are bigger issues in life and keeping those small episodes burning in your mind is unhealthy for you and your damaged relationships.

The irony is that it takes years sometimes, for the emotions to wear off, leaving the mind clear and able to think clearly again and for the affection to surface once more.

It is a wise person who can recognize that extinguishing fires can restore the balance in relationships. Igniting them can destroy them.

Often, we end up supporting the wrong cause and for the wrong reasons. That is a dark corner within us that we need to address.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Truth and Lies

Half the time, we are not aware that we are indulging in half-truths and justifying it. The mind does not want to accept this.

Truth and lies are always cloaked in personal likes and dislikes. We are blind to lies when uttered by someone we like. And we will believe it too. But if truth comes from a person we are not fond of, we would rather believe it is a lie.

We live within our minds everyday with such complexities which are most damaging to ourselves! And yet, we continue living this way. 

A few such episodes later, we are bound to feel a sense of unease, as if something is not right. That is the inner voice trying to inspire reflection. If I don’t see what I am doing, then a repeated pattern of repeated mistakes will result in unsavory outcomes.

Has this been your truth? The half-truth or half a lie?

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Ignorance

Have you noticed how many times we tell others not to worry and that “this too shall pass?” But the moment something irks US, we hold on and on to it till doomsday and it does NOT pass. We take it to the next life even. So intense is our ego state.

But the day wisdom dawns will come the realization that the “I” is enslaving you with spinning your story to coerce you into playing victim. Which is completely myopic.

Actually, nothing is permanent in this world and everything keeps changing in form. That is the natural flow as everything passes. It does!

So why do we want to swim upstream? In ignorance and Just to satisfy the “I” which has no substance when we realize everything is connected to one another. We just never rise above all the drama to learn more meaningful aspects of who we really are and how misled a life we are leading.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

 

Moment of Light

Have you thought about what you can do for yourself? Taking help from professionals is one thing but learning what you are doing against your natural flow is another.

It is an absolute illusion that we are in control of our lives. Life is a river-like flow. Trying to control its flow is trying to do the impossible. This tendency comes from fear, from the idea of separation because our ego does not feel the connectivity in the universe. The concept of “unity in diversity” is a very deep concept which we apply superficially.

When the heart is open and love flows, it blends in with the natural flow of life. That’s how it should be.

Wherever there is the energy of separation, there will be hurt and pain. LET IT GO. And fill the space with love and compassion. See how your life can change when you do this.

In relationships, when there is love, we smile at the quirks of one another instead of judging their actions. Love makes you the bigger person but often, you don’t want to be the bigger person. Letting go does not come easy but once it does, let me know what it does for you.

I have experienced that moment of light a few times.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

 

Spiritual Learning

When you help anyone in need, do it without expecting a return, and even less, wishing you had not helped at all.

Our spiritual learning is based on how connected everything is. And at such times, when you wish you had not helped, understand that God has been kind to you and given you the blessing of helping someone in dire need, where survival was the issue. It COULD have been you, but instead, the power to HELP was given to you. A karmic blessing. 

Helping someone in need is greatly rewarded by the universe. Though we may not have faith in this, when you give with a pure heart, you get in abundance.

But we don’t believe it! We need reciprocity in everything. And we are ignorant about the fact that rewards come from a higher place, not necessarily from the one we helped, if only we can have faith in the process of life.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

 

Self-Oriented

Ever since digi yatra started functioning, airport authorities at the Chennai gates block you and try to tell you how to operate it.

Funny! Because if I have downloaded it, I have also learnt to use it, right? AND, some of us HAVE travelled enough to be used to it.

If i was that person, I would wait to be asked to help. Instead of assuming that digi yatra is a mere fad and that most people are ignorant.

In fact, travel is not that easy anymore and many passengers tend to be unaware still. In many ways.

I only wish they were more aware that they are tearing down the ears of those sitting next to them, with their cell phones blaring songs and dialogues loudly and ABSOLUTELY NO AWARENESS here. Or, talking loudly to their families, a dialogue no one really wants to be a part of.

Cell phone addiction? Or sheer loneliness due to deprivation of that human touch we took for granted? That voice which is now converted to messages.

Is the average Indian today becoming more inconsiderate, more self-oriented and louder than before? Even a normal conversation sounds like a fight!

Maybe, the deeper psychology is that we shout because no one listens to anyone.

But let me tell you, raising your voice is no reason you will be listened to. In fact, people may even walk away.

So, find yourself. Listen to yourself. Look at yourself. Analyze yourself. Love yourself.

And Know that you are your best friend. You will always listen compassionately to yourself. So, be calm. Be peaceful. For, in this condition, you will get your answers whispered from within.

No need to shout. If you do, your voice will only echo back to you.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Self-Image

Everyone has a self-image. And no one likes to be marginalized. And it is also not a positive act. It is tantamount to marginalizing yourself. For, we are all mirrors of each other. That shows that you have been marginalizing an aspect of yourself.

These are wonderful triggers for you to assess yourself. This is the method to understand yourself. And why you mete out negativity to others. It is already prevalent in you and spills out on another. It is as simple as that, really.

So, no blame. No rancor. We correct ourselves as we go along. And when we illuminate those marginalized sides of ourselves, miraculously, we lose the tendency, the desire to marginalize others. And relationships improve by leaps and bounds. 

A win outcome possible with just a little self-assessment and correction.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/