Perspective

Gradually, over a period of time, you lose the stars in your eyes that you had when you were younger, and you acquire a more realistic perspective.

The mother of all perspectives is one that says, anything directed towards you is not FOR you. Any negativity thrown at us only speaks of how much work is required to be done by the people who would like to decorate us with their negativity on themselves.

Wisdom comes with a lot of intense pain, from experiences, conducive to growth or challenges to be met while remaining true to your own personality.

Justifying negatives, yours or someone else’s is like sinking your feet deeper into a quagmire.

Be like the sun which is constant even behind clouds. It does not diminish its light under any circumstances. It does not react to clouds covering it.

When sense dawns, everything superficial fades away. And what is left is the essence of us, our souls!

Surekha Kothari

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Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Impenetrable

All hurts, unhappiness and grief in relationships are there for all humans to be challenged with. Sometimes, the darkness around us is impenetrable! Or so we think at the time we are going through it.

But our survival mode is stronger than we think or know. The craving to live is the need of the soul because each soul has come for a purpose which needs completion. And this has little to do directly with relationships.

There are souls who lose heart and end their lives. There are others who leave the world through tragic accidents. They leave unfulfilled karma behind which will probably follow them in the next life.

There is so much we don’t know! Ironically though, often, we don’t even conform to what we know. There is no end to mental conflicts in such cases.

Somehow, the fragility of life eludes us most of the time. We only feel it when we see death. And this too seldom lasts long. As i said, the craving to live supersedes all and HOPE is what makes us all tick.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Self-Protection

I think this is the journey of many souls who have gone out with joy to help and connect and found themselves just “used”. I know no one gets “used” without their own permission. But it takes time for the givers to realize that they have been used. The reasons could be many, like love and caring, giving generously or then wanting something in return.

Ultimately, as we grow in years, our experiences either rejuvenate us or exhaust us. And in the latter, we are so debilitated in our energy that we prefer withdrawing contact from those who have been energy vampires in our lives. That also becomes a form of self-protection and healing.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Honesty and Humility

In being steadfast with someone, can we, should we mete out injustice to someone else? We are so focused on our personal likes and dislikes that we show our dislike through pettiness and being unfair. There is a middle ground. Sure, being steadfast is a wonderful trait. Everyone has a community of people they conform to, and are loyal to them. The middle ground is to maintain distance without actively acting against those who are not a part of your community but are around you. There is no need to pile on negative karma. We talk so much of karma. All this IS a part of your karma. Worse, when we disrespect those who have given us love and nurturing.

Can we awaken our conscience enough to understand what WE are doing wrong? And who are really your community that you may have discarded out of your own ignorance. The tendency for outward blame might stop and reflecting on oneself may begin a new sense of self-worth, based on honesty and humility. This would be more endearing a space, isn’t it? Let us not forget that just as eating sweets is a happy experience until it lands you with diabetes, some people who appear as sweet may not always have your best intentions at heart.

So it would be wise not to judge people by their external mannerisms, nor get swayed by the opinions of those around us. We must learn to develop our own sense of intuition if we want to become discerning of this need to be with the right people.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Self-Inflicted

Sometimes, intense grief can become like a warm blanket under which you want to hide from the world, not wanting to risk the speculation it might bring and the privacy it might challenge. Not everyone wants to shout out their stories aloud to the world. Or be talked about ad nauseum.

Ultimately, it is YOU for yourself, with yourself and more important, BY yourself. And you have to learn to live WITH this person that is you. And work to like what you see in you.

Before you hide under that blanket, though, do realize that everyone is hiding under their own blankets behind their social persona. And why not? Everyone is facing the onslaught of karma and trying to cope as well as possible.

I really want to say again and again. Be kind. Understand people even if you can see they are flawed and not doing the right thing. Realize that you are flawed too and coping in a similar manner.

Where then is the point of conflict? It seems so redundant to point fingers outwards when we are facing similar hassles? It has never made any sense to me to nurse self-inflicted wounds until they become a disease.

Cleanse, let go and observe experiences as karma unfolding. Everything will make sense then. It IS you, all the way. None else! And the other souls around you were meant to be there until their roles got over.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Similarities

 Everything is energy. Words have their own energy. Therefore, we must be very careful in what we say. To others, definitely but it is equally important what we say to ourselves.

I constantly catch myself saying very debilitating words to myself when I am angry or unhappy or even depressed. Running ourselves down, beating ourselves up for the mistakes we make… the ensuing anger and self-deprecation can become very hardened, like cement, over a period of time. And healing that becomes a difficult task.

Without realizing this, a lot of this is internalized through external sources and people. They seem to compound our already shaky opinions of ourselves.

We tend to cling on to the negative angles of every episode in our lives, forgetting that there are positive ways to look at the same episode. And those who can SEE the positivity have only an increasing positive energy in their words.

Our acceptance of everything depends on this. See things as just different instead of contrary to us and to see how peace can descend without conflict. See similarities instead of differences and your words will become gentle and comforting.

There is no need to run anyone down. Each one is here just to experience their body of karma. No one can be a clone of you. An apple cannot be an orange and a rose cannot be an orchid. They are all unique.

So are we, souls out here to help each other through each life to fulfil our soul contract.

So, guard your energies. With your thoughts, words and actions.

Live and let live amicably.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Reciprocity

It takes years to build relationship bridges. And not even a day to burn them. Valuing people when you get benefits out of them is nothing very spectacular. This is not the reason to sustain a relationship.

It’s caring, ever ready to help in need, unconditional love and a lot of understanding of their situations that cement bonds.

As you grow older, you feel the need to cement these bonds even more. Sometimes, you work alone and don’t get the same feeling reciprocated. So then the onus is on you. I don’t understand how you can suddenly “un love” a person. If you can, then that was never love.

That’s why it is said that love is its own reward. Love, if it fills up your heart. Don’t worry about any reciprocity.

Though, the heart chakra works to give and receive. And does get blocked if either one of the functions is partially or completely blocked. And this chakra is also a bridge between the earth and access to our higher self.

So much awareness is required each second. And we fail to be conscious enough. The joy of feeling the consciousness changing the inner environment to a lighter and warmer one has to be experienced.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari