When we go out to a restaurant, there is a huge menu we
choose from. These are items we love and want to indulge in . But they are not
necessarily good for our health. We still bypass that thought and make the
choice.
We tell ourselves, it is only for that meal. So, we end up eating that
food and develop indigestion or food poisoning.
Now, similarly , when damaging feelings enter us, we again
must choose either to let them in and adopt them as ours or let them go
immediately as being wrong for us. Knowing that this may start a pattern, we
still accept these feelings because we want to retaliate.
The main cause is that we have not been able to separate
ourselves from our egos. So, who gets hurt ? Who wants to retaliate ? It is the
ego. If we learn to make a choice against the ego and in favor of ourselves, we
can avert any illness of the mind.
If you want freedom from the ego, the most effective way is
to simply acknowledge the undesirable thoughts and emotions that came in and
the actions they set off. To say, "I was wrong" is really liberating.
To say, "I am sorry" and MEAN it is even more liberating. It just
clears the air within us and between two people also.
Not that you mean to, but
this rattles the opposite person and generally forces him or her to introspect.
Ultimately, our purpose is to work with love, not anger ,
resentment, fear or hatred, isn't it ?
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
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