Arrogance

Learning is directly proportional to your awareness that you NEED to learn to develop other parts of your personality. This awareness makes you come under the “smart” category. You can learn from anyone and anything if you want to. Yes, some of us like to make our own mistakes and learn and don’t want to be advised. But the last categories are the ones who come into the category of the ignorant. Once you feel you have all the answers, there is no learning or growth thereafter.

Who has all the answers? What it is, is an attitude of defiance, an element of ego that refuses to stand corrected an arrogance which stunts any possibility of illumination.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Lack of maturity

For all the complexes we develop, the seed is somewhere in our childhood. The need for love , comfort, warmth must be met in childhood. Sometimes, even if it IS met, in case of more than one sibling, the tendency to compare leaves some children in a “lack” mode. It is a mere perception. There is only one set of parents turning their worlds upside down to make every child feel loved and at the same time, giving attention where required . And herein lies one problem. Perceptions and comparisons often start here. To give an example, a weaker child takes away for attention naturally. But other children perceive this as “ less” for them. As favouritism .

And when these siblings grow up, the stories of wrongly perceived changing priorities of parents end up in children having complexes of being less wanted than the others. That insecurity and certainly a lack of maturity comes in the way of the parent sibling relationship and children who are now adults, choose to move away or blame parents based solely on perceptions.

There is something to be said about a natural tendency of trust of children in their parents. When a child can confidently say, “ my parents would never play favourites”. Lucky are those parents whose children learn to recognise such qualities in parents and learn to love them and their siblings as well.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Quote of the day

Satiation level

All our lives, we are told we must be balanced, balanced and more balanced. While we were kids on the see saw, the fun was exactly the opposite that is one side being up and the other side swinging up in seconds. Then we had the swing on which soaring higher and higher, one hardly knew what balance meant.

We read and preach a lot of theory. But actually, where is the balance? You love like crazy, like there is no tomorrow. You hate, waiting for tomorrow to avenge some deed or another. You eat the food you like until your tummy groans. You see serials like one addicted, forgetting day and night. You are constantly on whatsapp, face book and calls for hours. If you are a golfer, you never heard of the word "balance".

Today, I am a spoilt child of my parents. Tomorrow, I will want to do exactly what I feel like. Later, I will want much name, fame and money. And so on.... so much for balance! What is that saying that says...

Love as if you never loved before

Laugh as if you will never laugh again

Cry your heart out when it is in pain

Enjoy with every cell in your body....

So much for balance right!

I always think that balance means certain contentment, a satiation level. And this can spell a saturation for which you have to really be ready and would have to have arrived at that point.

How many of us have?

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Quote of the day

Quote of the day

Quote of the day

Common sense

"Common sense is uncommon" is a popular saying. I think good sense is equally uncommon. I mean, just look at us! We search for love but want it on our terms. When we have an issue with someone, we want the other person to come forward in reconciliation. We can prolong a simple misunderstanding indefinitely, being miserable and making another person equally miserable. But each one would rather convert themselves into a bunch of knots rather than forgive, forget and give a loving hug to each other. We are so funny that we will seethe in anger for years on a small issue ( of course, we amplify it to look humongous) but will not call it quits and move on.

Family feuds, sibling rivalry, petty comparisons... you name it and they are rampant and ultimately to what end? To lose valuable relationships and turn away from your own near and dear ones? To refuse to communicate to iron out hurts and misunderstandings? Only human beings can live with so much self promoted negativity, forgetting all the good times shared, the loving moments shared. More often than not, everything boils down to the "I am the one who is right" syndrome.

So, tell me. Isn't good sense uncommon?

I remember the story of the man who sat on the branch of a tree to cut some wood for fire and was cutting the very branch he was sitting on without the good sense that he would fall and break a few bones. If we look within us, we can see many such broken bones but would we admit that? NO, sure...we still boast of having good sense, you see!

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Involvement

Our spiritual texts speak of the third person perspective. A common parlance is also to be clinical. To keep your emotions away to stay out of involvement. But really, if you learn to observe people, it is an extremely interesting pastime. A study of humanities, humaneness and inhumanity as well. Without judgment and as an observer.

I have found that if you start doing this, gradually that observation starts to turn into introspection. Because you start sensing your own response, however clinical you may try to be. It is impossible to be 100 percent clinical. Even sadhus have feelings. But they are better with detachment than we are.

There is a constant learning this way, both at the macro and micro levels. And there is a wonderful side effect in that you feel light and happy, and hopefully, wiser, too.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Quote of the day

Quote of the day

Digesting success!

Digesting success! It is a social issue which increases with more materialism incorporating elements like excess wealth, celebrity status and the power that accompanies these, often bringing in a certain amount of carelessness, even callousness and riding slip shod over people because with a head in the clouds, looking down is not a virtue in possession.

Spiritually, these are often not compatible because of what they do to the psyche. It is only the odd person who can digest “success” in terms of good karma being rewarded and therefore, gratitude.

But there is a little good news…

Today, the tolerance to myopic attitudes is wearing thin. The wheel is turning once more towards the universal values and against self centered thoughts and actions at the cost of others.

Today, gradually, right is being applauded as right and wrong as wrong. I guess we are fed up of artifice, might is right, the attitude that the end justifies the means and the economic disparities which continue to make it difficult for the common man to keep a certain standard, especially when there is so much available that money can buy today.. And it doesn't help to have glaring publicity and opulence for those few who have much and state it every minute with their attitudes, their lifestyles and not enough demonstration of improving the lot of the masses in the country.

No, I am not either a communist or an anti capitalist. But I do believe in values like stooping when tall, humble when successful and contributing to creating a balanced society in every way.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Depression

Depression should not be allowed to step close to us. It has many, many repercussions. If you examine the reasons, one of the foremost ones would be the pain of unfulfilled expectations, especially of unrequited love.

As we know, no man is an island. But in developing relationships, there comes a tipping point which turns the relationship into one of dependency, into a need of a crutch. Automatically then, this is the start of the end of the relationship. Healthy bonds work differently. They can work on mutual dependency better than one stronger and one weaker link.

There is every need to strengthen our backbone to stand upright, even if to walk alone. Inner strength compensates for the presence or perception of many lacks. And it would be within the preview of wisdom to be aware that we journey alone from life to life. So, holding onto to any form of crutch is going to be nothing short of meaningless. Then why the depression?

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Quote of the Day

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