Boundaries

I have realized that living life on your own terms needs wisdom and a lot of letting go! You end up disappointing many expectations, many people for whom you are a crutch in many different ways. But without wearing our blinkers, our perceptions lose focus. And we owe that focus to ourselves for our lives.

Boundaries become an essential part of your plan for your own journey.

But, those who have similar energies will always understand you. And will be thoughtful around you and respectful of your journey.

You win some and you lose some. But most importantly, you never lose yourself in this journey from beginning to the end of this life.

Of course, the journey soul of the soul is not confined to this one life only. As they say in Hindi “picture abhi baaki hai “.

Aham brahmasmi we rise like waves and settle back into the ocean, all the while permanently living within that endless ocean of existence, consciousness and bliss.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Frustration

By and large, we humans judge more than love. I guess we are so needy that we want to be around those who give, who anticipate our needs and dedicate their lives to each other. Something most naturally expected from certain close relationships more than others. But what is forgotten is that whatever roles we are given to play inevitably come with challenges, sometimes ones that can take all our strength to endure.

As we are coping with our own grief, disappointments, and frustrations on one side, no one is really concerned but ourselves. And if we let that mask we wear in public, slip, we are in trouble! All kinds of speculation and judgement is thrown at us.

This is the human being of today, that is building artificial intelligence today, to emphasize the need for something external to come through as an aid for us. Who have moved away from everything natural, especially our divine collective consciousness that holds complete knowledge.

The vastness of the soul is only being researched by science now, whereas India knew it eons ago.

Read about Indian, even Egyptian civilizations and we see evidence of the spirituality of humans, the knowledge they possessed and the relationship to righteous living as the hallmark of divine connection. Are we on the wrong path then, or are we on the inevitable path of evolution? Wherever it takes us and to whatever consequences we face in the bargain.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Stimulation

As we advance in age, you know what becomes a moot question? That how many years have we tried to come up to other people’s expectations, to get that much craved for pat on the back to feel good and feel a sense of comfortable self-esteem?

And what does it take to come into our own as yet undiscovered space which belongs only to us? Rejected by none other than ourselves in exchange for temporary happiness handed out by others. The crumbs of happiness that actually had such a short life and yet, we never quite understood this and kept craving for many such short lives.

But the day we realize the happiness on reaching and discovering our own space, it appears as the most beautiful garden, the most complete and the most joyful! Coming into our own! Feeling so wholesome that there is no need for any external validation or stimulation to fill any empty spaces within. Because, you see, there ARE none!

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Consequences

We do many things during the day. Some are planned and some just come along on the spur of the moment.

But examine them and ask yourself, how many were done for others and how many for yourself? It is really interesting to see what you discover about yourself.

We are often judged by what we do not do to fulfil expectations which are not ours. And to placate and pacify and satisfy others, how much we compromise on our own energies.

But when you reach a point of balance and understand that everything you do has a consequence not in your control entirely, but your intentions have been clear, then you will begin to take steps towards what you feel fulfilled with and for which you don’t mind being misjudged by those who actually feel better if they bend you to their will.

And that is rampant all over, within human beings. Within the mental aberrations of humans, we have to achieve our mental balance. If you feel you are doing right by you, more often than not, people also understand this.

We need to keep to our path. Yes, it may be fraught with some discomfort but it is all better for you in the long run.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Divine

 

I think we need to understand that by praising someone else generously does not diminish US in any way. There is never any need to stay away from praise and no need to be insecure either.

Life has taken different turns for each of us. Some of us were unable to fulfil our dreams and may still be smarting within.

Tell me, did we not get other opportunities? Did we take them? If we were stuck on our unfulfilled desires, we could not move on. And probably that’s when we started getting envious of people who saw a dream and fulfilled it.

Never mind! We are all a part of a grand plan and equally divine.

Let us not measure ourselves through our own expectations and desires.

So, believe in the grand plan and keep your generosity intact. It will not diminish you, in fact, quite the reverse.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Accepting and Expecting

 

We have to leave everyone to heal at their own time and of their own accord. It used to be possible at one time to heal through frank communication. And clearing the mind of any residue feelings of negativity. I guess, no more ! There is more possibility of making it worse by talking …

Two similar sounding but diametrically opposite words are two ends of the spectrum: Accepting and expecting.

The first assists in moving forward. The second can bog you down pretty badly because your well being lies with someone else or something else . And you lose that much control.

We live in a world of time, space and causation. Accepting means giving time and space and waiting for the causes to fade from memory. Then healing happens.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Motivation

 A huge realisation that this pandemic has forced into us is , just how much valuable time we have wasted and lost in pursuing just worldly pleasures, if I can call them pleasures in my mistaken sense of perception.

And I don’t mean for a moment that one must not enjoy life. It is just that our definition of enjoyment has become very meaningless and unspiritual. We find enjoyment in trivia, meaning that there is not much value prevalent in certain activities. Trivia that sometimes brings out the worst in us.

Can I learn to balance my day to include a balance of these ? It is commonplace to quote,” all work and no play….”. But that is not accurate in this case.

Seekers of higher truths are few and far between but if goodness can be brought in within the realm of spirituality, then that is definitely a start.

Next, we must define goodness. To me, it is defined by a single line: “do unto others as you would have others do unto you”. Eliminate double or multiple standards to embark on a rightful path first.

Think before you dole out anything but goodness, because this is what you also expect from others. So, you cannot superimpose your will on anyone.

But we do it all the time.. people think they are good but what they do has nothing to do with goodness… all kinds of reasons and excuses taint our intrinsic goodness. And the worst part is, we tend to justify our actions all the time.

I would definitely say that if we start with a little bit of self healing ( and there are innumerable techniques available) , we can start a process which will certainly benefit us. The intention is first. Next is motivation and then commitment.

So be it !Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Parental expectations

 

Let a child be a child. Parental expectations from a child are often very unrealistic. Parents know it is their responsibility to bring up a wholesome individual. Only, they don’t always get it right.

Let us not get too critical of parents though, because ultimately, they will only act according to their circumstances and what they know to be the best decision at that moment. But, what we don’t ponder on is what our peers have claimed, that “buddhi karmanusarini”, that is, your karma determines your intellect.

Every child develops a perspective and that may shape future relationships. For example, two middle class parents working to make ends meet to make a comfortable life for their child might end up with a child who grows up with a minus mother, minus father image and perspective merely because the parents were not physically present because they were at work no one’s fault. Yet, there arises conflict, disappointments, resentments and all of that.

In life, perhaps, we just need to understand each other as much as possible and even beyond. Because, Can anyone live anyone’s journey? Can anyone judge anyone’s journey? Then what is left is love and understanding. This energy can only spread cheer and good will.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Realization

There are so many personal prejudices in current times, so many competitive attitudes ending with toppling another to climb onto their backs. Even conversations are only about others. And the topic is not really about people either. it is mostly about our own underlying envy , a desire to discredit someone in someone else’s eyes.

We are seeing this even on the larger canvas as in the current elections. And it is there because the average caliber of human being has been found wanting. Open hostilities indicate that there is no value for respect as a personal virtue. We are willing to give up our dignity, our grace to achieve what can only be a selfish end because, the qualities of people with a high sense of dignity and self respect are very different. They don’t need to downgrade themselves. They are confident and contented people.

I would like to think that the tide is turning towards a realization that values need to be generic and real, followed by everyone.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Attitude

We have a strange society. We try and stay away from controversy but don’t think twice about throwing others into controversy by speaking about them when they are not around to defend themselves. So, often, the issue gets compounded. And people love to hear such stories, as long as they are not about them.

These kinds of attitudes don’t help in creating cohesiveness. Only positive steps in creating bridges will do so. When do we begin the construction?

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Karmic experiences

An open and educated mind thinks beyond personal desires and looks at the various angles of its actions the options available as also the different consequences that might arise. There are a number of people who seem to be living in a bubble, in an alternate world , beyond objective reality and these are , for sure, more prone to shock waves from life . Why ? Because they never figured out that what they wanted might not actually happen and something else might happen. They never thought of alternative and god forbid there could be a heavy price to pay.

We forget that the unseen hand of God strikes hard sometimes when you are oblivious to everything other than yourself. Definitely, there is merit in observing certain good principles in life and support those who are an integral part of your life. Who YOU chose to bring into your life and out of all options, know that compassion goes hand in hand with support and that we all have feet of clay without exceptions.

We may be born with a silver or even golden spoon in our mouths. But humility before our karmic experiences along with understanding where we are straying will go a long way in.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Work

Work is worship popular saying and truly a very pertinent slogan for us all. The opposite side of the coin that says, an idle mind is a devil’s workshop.

Constructive work keeps the health and happiness quotient on a consistent level. It’s been my experience. It is a way of giving back to yourself what you know to be your core as a part of divine energy. What you think you are giving outside is actually what you are returning to yourself.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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