Sense of Humility

Holding space for someone else is the ultimate act of kindness. There is always a danger to end up strengthening your ego by attaching yourself to tags. Like kind, spiritual, helpful etc. Are we cultivating a sense of humility or are we talking about it to everyone willing to listen, and also with an attempt to impress? That is EGO attachment. And culminating in arrogance very often.

There are people who are quietly philanthropic. You never know how silently they act. These are genuine souls who don’t seek praise.

Life is all about carving out who we want to be at the end of the day.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Connectivity

 You have to believe in the intrinsic goodness of people. If we believe that there is a divine hand in the creation of this world and therefore, there HAS to be an element of this divine energy in everything, then every soul is pure.

Of course, there are layers of pollution piling up for various reasons. Healing those with awareness and consciousness is the prime soul contract while transiting from life to life. And no! It is NOT easy. The churning and turmoil, the pain and the disappointments are all related to our identification with our body and mind. We are unable to transcend these to identify our soul purpose which brings us here. And we are all in this together! The reason to follow a path of dharma, of compassion, simple humility and a clean mind is simply this. Truth lives within these qualities and so does human connectivity. Our minds have gone berserk, looking at the destruction around the world. With power at your command, you can kill with the press of a button. But, killing with kindness and empathy are laughable concepts with most people.

All three aspects of Shiva, as creator, preserver and destroyer are within us. People who pray to Shiva, and are in awe of the qualities he exhibits, are still unable to understand that prayers are meant to embody Shiva in OUR lives, to practice what he symbolizes. Look within, identify the three traits within and work on them.

Surekha Kothari

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

www.instagram.com/author_surekhakothari/

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Aspects of Kindness

 When it concerns wrongdoing, we are aware that it is wrong. We still go ahead. The aspects of kindness/compassion get subdued by the ego and the ego defies the goodness of the heart which we all have.

But goodness gets suppressed or camouflaged when the ego comes to the forefront.

We need the awareness that the ego is also a tool that is not all bad. It is sometimes a survival tool related to our self-esteem. If we are not comfortable in our own skin, we may try to seek self-respect through our egos. But maybe, there is another way. This one could become a self-destructive exercise if we do not have the wisdom of discernment of human beings.

The reason being that the ego does not really recognize love in anyone else. It is self-consuming. Hence, the need for wisdom. Otherwise, we may arrive at crossroads in relationships.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Compassion

 

Compassion is possible because we are all mirroring each other. I can feel your hurt because I have been there or close to that feeling myself. I also need to understand that reactions to the same event can be different in different people. And suffering is on different levels of intensity and ability to cope.

And yet, why do we start judging instead of understanding when it is impossible to get into anyone else’s shoes ? I have realised that when we judge others, we have forgotten to be kind to ourselves ! Or compassionate for that matter. Yes, sounds paradoxical ! But not really so.

When we are not comfortable in our own skins , we don’t want to accept our selves , especially our darker areas. So, in order to feel good, however temporarily, it is easier to point a finger outwards for the same weaknesses we may also carry. Because we always attract similar people who mirror our weaknesses. Through them, the universe is teaching us to accept those areas within us, heal and move on in our journey.

All we need is the realisation that we are all imperfect and the journey is about our own learning and healing. Not about judging others . Let them look after their own journey.

It is not our business to treat anyone as small or inferior . This is where kindness / compassion come in. If you must , help people who are struggling to heal, instead if maligning them and throwing brickbats. And shunning them. Human weaknesses are not contagious diseases . So, Our censure makes US inferior people because our lower self is at work at this time. WHY are WE intolerant of someone else ?

 

We need to ask ourselves this question which may lead to a can of worms within ourselves that we are afraid to open.

Compassion and kindness, therefore, need a much deeper understanding.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Recognize

 At the end of the day, after tremendous conflict, upheavals, blame, resentment, hatred, we have only one place to dwell: within ourselves! Do we like our place?

Whether this self is healthy or sick is solely to be determined by us. And both health and disease are self-created.

Do we become better by pointing out how terrible someone else is? No.

Does looking down at others make us superior? No.

Does talking down to elders receive acceptance? No.

Do we increase our energy by shunning people? No

Actually, which reactions really make us peaceful and happy? Only proactive ones can.

Strange are the ways of people! They are quick to tag others but little do they know that people may be sweet on the face but are tagging you at the back.

If we are polluted, we will definitely bypass all the goodness of others and focus only on their polluted parts. The simple math here is, only when we know something can we recognize it in others. If our slate is clean, we will be oblivious of any negativity in others. So, when we point a finger outwards, it points right back at us.

The message from every philosopher, ever spiritual teacher, therefore, is WORK ON YOURSELF and criticise others only if YOU are perfect.

Love, support, kindness, warmth, empathy are human traits of connectivity with the entire universe. We are so small sometimes, in our thoughts and in our actions. Even if we seek expansion, it is not to include others, but, in fact, to exclude others to gain exclusive power … god knows, to achieve what???

Nothing lasts. Everything is flowing past and we don’t even know it in our ignorance. Like good manure harvests a good crop, so, the manure of spiritual thinking and doing will harvest a good crop: YOU. Isn’t it worth it?

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Kindness and Compassion

 

Many issues that we deal with during healing come from early conditioning.  Most parents bring up their children as they want to see them, not as they are. They are taught likes and dislikes very early. They are taught social distancing even before they are old enough to understand.

Instead of learning pure and innocent qualities from children , parents try to teach their children many lessons which are coloured by their own prejudices, likes and dislikes , even hatred.  Adults dump their own baggage on the children which is just criminal ! They are already handicapping their children emotionally and mentally.

This is the reason why parents also don’t care enough for their own parents. So much lip talk but no genuine caring or compassion ! It is one thing to lead your own life and another to give back what you received. But that is forgotten.

I see parents holding their children back from their grandparents because of their own , often very misunderstood, personal grouses. It is so unimaginable in an educated society where we are all meant to understand kindness and compassion which the have nots find to be a luxury because they are barely surviving.

But… those who live more than comfortably are known to be stuck with an egoistic mind which denies them any sound advice or bringing in the light of human principles to make that shift into humaneness.

The biggest lesson for us today is to accept this change from earlier times. And the biggest difficulty is also to suppress love for people who mete out ego based treatment to those who love them.

The heart needs a lot of healing , away from the negative ego. The ability to understand someone who loves  you within their own karmic challenges requires a lot of empathy and compassion . Only genuine love can accomplish a sound relationship. Otherwise, hurt and more hurt awaits around the corner to fracture relationships and fragment the wholesomeness of a person. Through constant blame !

As I have always said, we have the freedom of choice. Either to become simple and understand what life is and how it should be lived, or feel happy in distancing yourself from the ones that actually love you,

So much to learn and yet, so much unnecessary piling of daily baggage !

Humans rarely elevate to a higher vibration, almost validating the downgrading of humanity itself. We can see this in what the world is today… only due to the lowest form of human existence. Everywhere , complexes, hate and vengeful actions dot the skyline over this world, masked by capsules of sweet words which may be hiding many undesirable motives in the heart.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Kindness

 

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Brand of caring

I have seen that many people push away good and caring relationships by taking them for granted or not understanding their brand of caring. Sometimes, there also seeps into a long term friendship a kind of envy which leads to two people growing apart.

When you have known someone a long time, and life takes you into different modes, you tend to look at that friend with a certain comparison. And if, at that time, you are an unhappy human being, you tend to forget the close bonds you shared and begin to gradually tear apart the relationship. And once you reach a point of no return, you have burnt your bridges until you realize what you lost. By then, it is too late.

Better to make a point in your book never to reach a point of no return. Life is not about “you”. It works only if it is about “us”, that “us” could be two people or more.

Besides, those who have experienced the bonds of love will tell you there is no feeling better, no joy greater than a no holds barred friendship and closeness. It could be between any two people. If the base is compassion on both sides, the rest follows.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Prime Importance

It is really important to know why we do certain things. Why we think in a certain way. Why we react in a particular manner. Is any of this coming under the justification category ? Or is it our lopsided view of the world, people or even ourselves ?

I find there are people who are out to attack you for simple , unintentional and caring ways. They need to look deep down within themselves to see exactly WHAT plagues them. There are conflict areas in everyone’s lives. But to know who to trust and even what to trust is of prime importance.

It is so much easier to preach than to practice. Because the awareness may be only externally oriented.

The ones that go in to their own dark corners will see light sooner than those who block their inner light but continue to work for external value. Of course, value there will be for the world to see. But inner growth ? That comes with inner virtues which are honed painstakingly and from within, ripping apart the thick layers on the mind that create a continuous cloud over the light. But it is for each one of us to realise that. Ironically, this doesn’t come through even “Satsang” . Feeling good momentarily is different from feeling good in the moment and in every moment. And that happens only when we become simple , pure and transparent like glass. Like channels through which God can work.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Contagious

The word "contagious" has been coming to mind often. A smile is obviously contagious. But then, a viral is also contagious. Is contagiousness an automatic response? Someone smiles at you and you automatically smile back.

But sadly, generosity is not. Charity is not. Kindness and compassion are not. Love , the divine energy, is always in short supply.

I would like to say that hatred and envy are not. But when I see the cut throats society today, I can't help feeling that somewhere, some lethal virals like merciless pursuits of power and money became contagious and brought the ethical and moral values down, thus bringing society down. When we started living for ourselves, we forgot to be connected and so, did not respond to external stimuli. And without that, where is the question of anything being contagious ? We don't possess the band width for it.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: 

www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

Human kindness

When you go through something major in life, like a trauma, a sudden episode where the presence of God really hits you, there occurs a major change in your life, in your priorities. What used to matter so much seems trivial, even laughable? The first thing that hits you is, what was the point of giving less importance to yourself, your health and more to external factors  and more important, the unimportant factors.

Most of us make this mistake. Yes, I do call it a mistake because often, you lose awareness of your own body, mind and soul in catering to outside circumstances and people. Definitely not worth it in the long run, is it? You need people when you are unwell and there is no guarantee they will be there. Instead, just be well. Look after yourself first. Wear your oxygen mask first. And then, use the milk of human kindness to help others.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

SpeakingtreeBlog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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