In
all my years of counseling and healing, I have known most families as
dysfunctional. Today, if people are opting more for friends than family,
unfortunately, things have evolved to this situation.
The
tragedy is that over the years, economic and social differences crept in and
comparisons corroded the fabric of closeness and unity.
It is amazing how "family" members stake ownership without owning the
responsibility aspects in the family. They feel "deprived" without
working, wronged without adding value and demand without deserving.Not only are marriages in trouble but materialism
has almost destroyed many families.
Another important aspect that has developed
is the indiscipline of the youth and their insolence with elders, playing
favorites, taking sides and open antagonism. It is disturbing to see that there
are no controls on them and elders are so helpless. Or, in some cases, it is
elders who encourage this due to their own prejudices. They don't realize how
they are damaging their own
children in the long run.
We really need to introspect and change our
priorities and revert back to some of the earlier values that kept families
together. This can happen only if family members also became friends and
practice the same modes of attitudes and behavior that they do with friends.
Why unrealistic expectations with regard to family members?
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
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