Showing posts with label Character. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Character. Show all posts
Sunday, 16 June 2019
Thursday, 11 October 2018
Tuesday, 28 August 2018
Thursday, 2 August 2018
IT IS WHAT IT IS
When you don't talk about yourself much,
people feel you are alright. And you have no burning issues. But, actually,
some just don't have the habit. Some are too private. Some don't see what this
will accomplish. Some feel, "why bore others? How does it concern them?"
Or even, why it should concern them, Kind of "not done" kind of
feeling.
There are some who feel a part of other
people when they talk about their personal issues. But often, I have seen that
many also go through life's journey managing it as independently as they can. I
wonder if being vulnerable to people's attention is viable in the long run. It
is difficult to put yourself in the opposite type of shoes from those which you
wear.
The final word of course, is, IT IS WHAT IT
IS until it isn't that anymore.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Wednesday, 4 July 2018
Tuesday, 5 June 2018
Sense of excitement
If only every human being had that one
ingredient for life: a sense of excitement! Like, when we are sitting at the
edge of our seats in a thriller movie, just waiting to see what the next scene
will bring. If we could translate that into our lives and wait for the next
thing to happen!
Of course, there are sad episodes one can't
possibly equate to anywhere close to exciting. There are "Navarasas"
or nine types of emotions, all of which are within us. Yet, our attitudes make
us. Or break us very easily said than done though.
When life happens, the best of us crumble
at times. But we accept that we crumbled. And then the resurrection happens.
And we look ahead again at what life brings to us next.
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Thursday, 28 December 2017
Equation
What
do I gain or lose is a prime question in relationships today. It often takes a
long time for people to understand people, even if they have lived in close
proximity. In fact, especially when they have lived in close proximity, whatever
the name of the relationship. Either the understanding is lacking or the
population around makes minced meat of the equation, In ANY relationship.
So
much wear and tear happens within our emotions and expectations that we don't
see a lot of things with clarity. And, ultimately, we start feeling that we are
gaining only headaches and depressions and losing our health and peace of mind.
And then the inevitable happens...distances.
One
of the big challenges is when there is a communication cripple confronting you
who is impossible and too complicated to read unless you are a clairvoyant… And
YOU are intrinsically a demonstrative and spontaneous person who subsequently ,
is forced to start closing up and getting all bottled up because their words
are hitting a wall and coming back to hit them. It is an unnerving feeling and
one that closes channels like nothing else does.
Under no circumstances can shrink or
twisting personalities against your will contribute to your well being. So, the
cognizance of gains and losses may be replaced by the questions of how meeting
points may be arrived at, if both can will this as the course of action, of
course. Between the two sides of the distance pole lies the meeting point and
the way towards reducing that distance starts with the capturing of the
mischievous little devil called " ego" and blindness towards those
who are mischief makers because, after all, you love them, don't you ?
Surekha
Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Thursday, 13 July 2017
Foolishness
Very often, we seem to have little or no
control over our thoughts. They keep coming almost like a cyclone and shake up
the very core of an individual. Very few have the awareness and capacity to
stop them when required, observe them and change them if and when necessary.
Sometimes, out of nowhere, some thoughts
connected with old wounds surface suddenly. And then we understand that the
healing is still pending. We will not get over these thoughts unless we heal
them. Through understanding, love and forgiveness. What damages healing is also
the intensity of negative feelings. The more intense, the less the ability to
let go and more the pain and resentment.
Often, we are also so helpless with
thoughts coming in. We actually believe that thoughts just come in. But from where?
And do we have the power to regulate them or not? Do we KNOW we create them AND
have the power to let them go, bring them in, transform the negative ones at
will and by choosing the direction we want them to take? Perhaps not.
People say they tried but no resolution was
found. Again, let us ask "why". Because we insist on playing and
replaying the same old "hurt" tape in our mind.
Again and again and again. We want a salutary
action, a re conciliatory action from the person who has hurt us. Right? We are
unwilling to let go till this is done.
We don't realize that WE can sort this out
ourselves. Why do we need the crutch or a dependency to feel better? Or even to
forgive and forget? Come on! Resolve the hurt yourself. Because you CHOSE to
get hurt. Right? So, why expect someone else to solve YOUR issue, created by
YOU?
We need to get out of the mode of
"approval seeking" and emotional dependence. We want to belong
somewhere, lean on someone because we don't know how to live with people AND be
independent. We keep loaning or giving away our precious energy to them.
The help we expect from others can be
easily done through self counseling because at the end of the day, it is OUR
ego that initiates the hurt. So, with counseling the ego, it is possible to
heal it and even smile at what we realize now, was utter foolishness on our
part.
Simple, my dear Watson! How can anyone hurt
me if I don't WANT to get hurt?
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari
Sunday, 21 May 2017
Thursday, 19 January 2017
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